Disbelief

If anyone had told me that I would be unmarried and socially isolated at the sge of forty five, I would not have believed them. Yet, here I am. And, even harder to believe, I prefer to avoid social situations now.
The public voice I have is not at all what I would have expected.
Disability came silently, and invisibly. It is something I expected eventually, but I expected to be much older, and possibly prepared for.
I do at times enjoy the quieter lifestyle of this solitary retreat into my own thoughts. But I obviously don't want to be totally alone, or I wouldn't be writing it here.
The people who deliver prescriptions from the pharmacy have become my best friends. The actual old friends I have, I speak to by telephone or email. I always enjoy the occaisional reply.
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